Dear Mary: My girlfriend that is lesbian and are thinking a threesome with a guy

I will be a bisexual girl in my very early 20s and also been with my gf, that is a lesbian, for more than couple of years.

I’m the happiest We have ever been. We have never desired to cheat and have always been genuinely fulfilled and satisfied within our relationship and I also think my partner could state the exact same.

We recently met a person whom hinted which he’d prefer to have a threesome with us.

Now, being two women that are young a relationship usually brings these kinds of provides, but we have been really considering fulfilling up using this one.

My spouse and I always talk things away and work out a joint choice on every thing and I also understand we are going to perform some same right right here, but i needed some other opinion and thought you would certainly be the very best to provide it.

My concerns are that my gf will not take pleasure in the experience. She actually is a lesbian but has usually discussed her dream of me personally with guys.

We additionally stress that she will not feel she actually is sufficient during intercourse for me personally after seeing me personally with a person. I’m maybe not at all worried that it would make me realise I’ve been missing men if we do this. I think it might, but, be considered a thing that is good our company is young and would like to test before getting married and precisely what follows from then on.

My thoughts that are overall now are, if it is not broken do not repair it. Our sex life does not require spicing up – for me – but i am wondering whenever we should give it a try as it mightn’t really harm that much.

A Your gf features a dream of seeing you with a person, as well as the guy that no doubt was met by you features a fantasy to be with two females.

Also you are thinking about facilitating these two people by having the suggested threesome though you are very happy with how things are at the moment.

I need to state that We share your reservations. Differing emotions have already been reported by individuals who have skilled threesomes, which range from experiencing a bit overlooked and lonely to being quite jealous of seeing their partner having sex that is satisfying someone else.

The countertop argument is it is simply intercourse without psychological participation, nevertheless the truth is that thoughts can not be rejected once they happen. Generally there is a risk that the gf may possibly not be too delighted seeing you with a person – and maybe you having fun when you are, in the end, bi-sexual – and experiencing that she will never ever satisfy you in how which he can.

You might see things quite differently, however you need to keep in mind her reaction that is possible.

It appears like you’ve got an excellent relationship along with your gf and if you’re both delighted then there’s you don’t need to alter things and danger upsetting this.

One other danger is the fact that then she can no longer use it as a fantasy if you make her fantasy a reality, and it doesn’t work out.

With her, exploring what possible reactions you would both have if you are together with a guy before you make a final decision it would be a good idea to talk the whole thing through.

It much more genuine you might view some feminine- centred porn together – something such as in the event that you desired to make to see the way you both feel imagining yourselves in whatever situation you will be viewing.

This could provide you with some insights and help to make up your minds.

I do not quite follow your train of idea once you state you may like to test before engaged and getting married.

Making the last dedication to one another should never actually alter any such thing. Undoubtedly such a thing goes between two adults that are consenting long when you are maybe perhaps not breaking regulations.

If only you a lot more years that are happy.

You can easily contact Mary O’Conor anonymously by going to or e-mail her at [email protected] or write c/o 27-32 Talbot Street, Dublin 1. All communication shall be treated in self- self- confidence. Mary O’Conor regrets that she actually is struggling to respond to any relevant concerns privately.

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